Overloaded Circuits: a Poem for World Bipolar Day, March 30, 2014


I’m in somnia

with jackhammer brain

a buzzing mind

a humming with emotions

thoughts and pictures

memories of joys

lost to death

spirits close to my heart

seemingly worlds away

guilt, loss and happiness

sickness and death

as well as

breathtaking beauty

a bedfellow with

gnawing worries

and gnashing nerves

fleeting images from films and

music playing at high speed

in the library of my mind

voices of today, yesterday and

fears of tomorrow

vying for an ear

asking me to listen

to them all

all at once

a cacophony of sounds

in the humming silence

of the specter-filled

haunting darkness

with fearsome death dangling

its loathsome threats

before my darting eyes

afraid not for myself

but of losing him

as he lies beside me

breathing noises

breeding worry, sorry

dashing thoughts of love, passion, doubts

a scarily-still lump beside


manic me

finally arising out of

maudlin months

of dismal darkness

and deep, dark despair

when death smelled sweet to me


I get out of bed

to lay my face

upon the windowsill

to gaze at the mystery sky

full of twinkling stars

glittering to the rhythms

of the pulsing universe

my only hope for some

semblance of somnolence

my only chance for peace.

For info on my Bipolar memoir, please see:

12 responses

  1. breathtakingly beautiful, moving, full of atmosphere, full of feeling, Ellen, have a nice week-end, warm regards Mitza


    March 29, 2014 at 12:39 PM

    • Thank you, dear Master Jewelry Artisan, for your complimentary comment. Glad you liked it. You have a good weekend, too. Warmest regards, Ellen


      March 29, 2014 at 4:04 PM

  2. heart wrenching


    March 29, 2014 at 12:54 PM

  3. Running Elk

    Incredibly evocative, Ellen. Feels like a soul bared. Your honesty is humbling. xx


    March 29, 2014 at 2:11 PM

    • Thank you so very much, Running Elk, for the lovely comment!! Thanks for your continued support!! Much appreciated!! xx 😉


      March 29, 2014 at 4:02 PM

  4. Thanks for the wonderful poem, I have some idea now of the depth of this mind state. A valuable statement, could lead to some new thought on finding the cure, the way out…


    March 29, 2014 at 10:04 PM

    • Thank you so much! Glad it offered insight. Much obliged, Ellen


      March 30, 2014 at 10:09 AM

  5. Walker Karraa, PhD

    Reblogged this on Stigmama.


    March 30, 2014 at 8:51 PM

  6. Walker Karraa, PhD

    Reblogged this on Stigmama.


    March 30, 2014 at 9:34 PM

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