Prayer of Despair
Oh God,
where art thou?
I feel Thee not near me
clouds obscure Thy light
fields lie barren like my soul
Love was in my heart
but I feel it not
all is obscured
Pain and illness
shroud all light
in shadows of darkness
joy but a faint memory
as the mountains
in the grey distance
hope is out of season
bountiful is despair
a sin
yes
I sin the sin of darkness
and wish I could blend
into the greyness
and retire
into nothingness
Oh God,
forgive my ingratitude
for my many blessings
now shrouded in the night
so I can no longer see
Come to me
breathe life into my soul again
and let me see Thy Light
let me see love again
it was there
how does it seem to vanish
and take with it all hope
for why else is there to live?
MOONSIDE 
plaintive and moving
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January 24, 2014 at 12:01 PM
Thank you kindly, dear Paul!
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January 24, 2014 at 4:31 PM
Raw honesty of the heart in the midst of despair, but as the photo displays, somehow Light is always there, and the darkness cannot extinguish it. This is a piece filled with pathos, Ellen. Blessings, Dee
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January 24, 2014 at 1:54 PM
Thank you so much, Dee, for such a lovely comment! I tried to be honest. Blessings to you as well, Ellen
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January 24, 2014 at 4:32 PM
i’d like to have you on my spotlight, if you’d allow me. it is where i keep my favorite bloggers and their lovely posts.
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January 24, 2014 at 9:41 PM
How lovely! I would be honored, Marlyn. I have seen this on your blog. You are most kind. Thank you and blessings, Ellen
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January 25, 2014 at 7:40 AM
Oh Ellen, you have put to words so poignantly and so elegantly a place that I have been to in seasons past. It truly does seem as if “hope is out of season” at low points in our life. This is when we need others to hope for us and sprinkle the glitter of golden faith upon the dark path so we can see just enough to walk in Light again.
Blessings ~ Wendy
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January 25, 2014 at 2:41 PM
I am glad what I wrote rings true. But what you wrote in your comment is beautiful– about golden faith– really beautiful like the rest of your writing. Blessings to you, Ellen
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January 25, 2014 at 4:51 PM
beautiful rays 🙂
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January 26, 2014 at 3:46 AM
Oh, Joshi, thank you so much. As I have said before, I admire your photographs so much, it means a great deal to me that you write a comment about my efforts.
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January 26, 2014 at 11:09 AM
Beautiful, I totally relate.
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January 26, 2014 at 6:18 AM
Thank you, that makes writing that post all worthwhile. And is encouraging. I floundering around at sea and your reaction might be a sign of which direction I must go.
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January 26, 2014 at 11:04 AM
Universe is everywhere, hence no center to point, or direction to send our thoughts of despair. I have noticed that It listens to the deepest cries of our soul. It teaches us how to find our own food, but only seldom feeds us freely.
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January 27, 2014 at 5:52 PM
It is images like that that remind me always that I am never alone. The power and beauty of such creations can only mean there is One greater than I. He is always not far
Yisraela
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January 27, 2014 at 6:55 PM
These are negative affirmations, Ellen. It only adds to the suffering. Smile, even when you don’t feel like it — it will change a mood. If you change the negative affirmations, God will not have to come and rescue you. Helplessness is crippling, especially when a person is having mental and emotional challenges. Many prayers are a cover for learned helplessness and then God is supposed to ‘fix it’.
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January 31, 2014 at 5:19 PM
Thank you for your advice and viewpoint. It is helpful to see my thoughts as negative affirmations and constantly try to stop them and make them positive. Not easy being Bipolar and Aspie with physical illnesses as well. But I will try. Thank you for caring and taking the time to comment.
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January 31, 2014 at 9:20 PM